Quis Custodis Ipsos Custodes?

There seems to be a consensus among the main-stream media, and in particular RTE, that no mention of the Garda Siothcana can be made unless it is prefaced with comments to the effect that we have a wonderful police force and nobody is having a go at the guards.
I beg to differ.  We have a dreadful police service in [...]

A Pointless Exercise

So now we know.  Even the guards are totally confused by the penalty points system.
When drivers reach the dreaded twelve points, there is apparently no agreed mechanism for taking away their licences.  As a result, drivers who should be suspended simply carry on truckin’ with impunity.
As for the all-singing-and-dancing hand-held units that the guards were supposed to be [...]

The only surprise is that it came as a shock

Mrs. Knucklehead and the young Knuckleheads were under strict instructions not to venture anywhere near the centre of Dublin today.
The first surprise of the day was that they actually paid attention to something I said and stayed at home.  The second was that the authorities were shocked by the level of violence.
Why?
If you plonk several hundred [...]

Would sir like leg or breast…or arm…?

A British artist has created a life-sized model of her own body – in bread.  And on Sunday, she intends to watch the audience at an exhibition eat her alter ego.
Which should lead to some interesting snippets of conversation:
“Have you tried a pinky?  Very tasty, I must say.”
“Indeed.  And it’s so handy for the dip.”
 Or:
“Arse?”
“Same to you, [...]

Tail Wags Dog, According to Rottweiller

I see Mickey McDowell is at it again, claiming it doesn’t matter whether Bertie Ahern or Enda Kenny is the next Taoiseach.  And he does have a point.
Mind you, by the same token, it wouldn’t matter whether Mickey Mouse or Donald Duck were the next Minister for Justice.  Either of them would do a far better [...]

Wild Waters

Don’t you just wish John Waters would put a sock in it and stop moaning about his Eurovision song?
In the words of Ross O’Carroll-Kelly, he should build a bridge and get over it.
A bridge over troubled Waters, you might say…
 

How many crocodiles can you get in a car boot?

Ten, apparently.  At any rate, that’s the number of crocodiles discovered in the boot of a car stopped by police and SPCA officials outside Newry on Thursday.  A variety of poisonous reptiles was also found in the boot.  (No, really!)
There were red faces all round, however, when the occupants of the boot turned out to be [...]

Foot-in-Mouth outbreak spreads!

Following on Bertie’s condone/condemn goof yesterday, here’s Mary Harney, quoted today, following an appearance at the Mahon Tribunal:
“Political fundraising is the norm and we have to raise money to run election campaigns, but there’s no question of the Progressive Democrats accepting money in lieu of favours.”
Presumably, she meant to say, “…in return for favours”.
Or did [...]

Just desserts for choosey couple

I’m delighted to see that Lala and Joe Dowse have been called to account.
The Dowses, who now live in Azerbaijan, adopted an Indonesian boy, Tristan, in 2001 and then placed him in an orphanage two years later. (Apparently Tristan didn’t react in a positive way to them.  All together now: Awwwwwwww…)
The Dowses have been ordered to [...]

Ever heard a more biased commentary?

Those Sky commentators were disgraceful tonight.  If Del Horno had pulled a gun and shot Messi, they would have dismissed it as “slight contact”.
Where’s that cat?  I feel the need to kick something…